Category: Faith

Life Struggles

Remain Positive.

As humans, most times we only desire to get things right.
We try out all we can
Hoping that we must get it right.

At times, it turns us to be so.
We become fulfilled
And see things as being oversimplified.  

But, it is not usually the case.
There are times our handwork do not pay.
What matters is that we do not relent.

It could be that so much is expected from us,
It could result from any eventuality,
It could be down to fate.

It is of our best interest to always be willing to try
And do not give up
Because, once there is life there is hope.

It is well.

Follow @AyinotuV

More Effort All The Time.

In certain cases, it is down to luck that we excel. However, generally speaking, it is the amount of effort that we put in that actually determines how far we go.

For some people, it could take little time while for some it requires lots of hard work and more time but at the end we all get there. 
That brings me to the main topic. How do we ensure that the passion we have for a particular idea or an issue at the beginning keeps burning? It is very important that we always bear this in mind because we still need this very passion to remain successful at all time.
But this is not always  the case. Most times, we simply forget what it took us to attain a certain height in life and thereby easily let ourselves get carried away. Consequently, we fumble  and may be worst than how we were  before we ever got started. 
This is not only applicable to our studies or at workplace but can be seen in all areas of life. For instance, in relationships / marriages, always remind yourself of what it took you and meant to you to get to where you are and ensure you have that in mind to make you stronger and more productive, otherwise, you might simply feel so relaxed and unknowingly to you, you  might have deviated so much from the person you used to be.
In workplace/ school, it is equally essential because nobody knows it all and there are numerous innovations on daily basis, so do not relent. If you found yourself on top, always challenge yourself. 
It is applicable in our spiritual life and make us do things we could not have imagine. 
No condition needs to be stagnant as humans we easily feel bored and are quite insatiable.  Always challenge yourself by trying to be and remain on top. 
Always remember that the Rich (be it politicians, athletes, entertainers, movie stars e.t.c.) still struggle to remain on top otherwise it would have been when you make it once in life you back out but it is not the case. The struggle continues.

I once came across a write-up that says  ‘Always do the best you can while alive because you would have a longer time to sleep when you are dead’. That does not mean we do not have to enjoy our lives but it is a sort of reminder.  Besides, our motivations play an important role in how we handle situations.

Most people believe that attaining a greater height in life is very difficult and challenging while others think that the hardest part is to remain successful.

All the best in all you do. 


The Quest for a better way of life.

Most times, we spend a lot of time doing things that we think that are really important to us. Some times, we feel the we would be better off if we had 25 or 26 hours a day. There are too many things that need to be attended to and we try as much as we can to make ends meet.
Yet, we fail to spend quality time with God in prayer.

We think other things are of utmost importance and end up leaving out the most important of all.  There are either work or school  activities and personal needs issues that seems to consume all our time and we have reminders to ensure we are punctual because the penalty would not be fair on us but when it has to do with praying or going to church we tend to drag our feet.

Nowadays, we spend so much time on our bodies, decorating our faces, styling our hairs, checking out which section of hairs needs to be waxed or combed, think of what to wear, try them out, worry about how others are going to view us and the rest of them. I am actually referring to everyone, I think guys are worst these days. Yes! Times have changed, it is no longer applicable to women alone.

Nevertheless , the quest for a better life, to climb up the academic ladder, to gain promotion at work, become a successful  trades-person or performer and becoming richer should be likened to, if not same for our spiritual life.

We should endeavour to set some time for our own welfare by praying. Quality time in prayer is very essential as we might need not only to ask but to listen quietly. Most times we ask and ask and never listen.

Group and routine or recitative prayers are equally beneficial and shows that we have interest and are somewhat committed. However, we need to make an extra effort to communicate with God alone.

We need to unwind ourselves and absorb Him, in our own time, talking to him in our own language and pace as though we need to make Him know our unique voice and style. 

Prayer Times.


Indeed, it is a humble attitude that we seek the face of God in times of difficulty as it implies we know He is our Sovereign Master; Who knows the unknown and sees beyond human comprehension.

These moments draw us close to God. We try to mend our ways while relying on His mercy to see us through. I can recall in my school days that at various institutions we only indulge in Novena, fasting and praying mainly during examination periods. We tend to act so religiously and would even be willing to make trouble with anyone who seems to be acting in a way we think would disrupt our prayers.

We do set all sorts of standards for ourselves during these periods. At one occasion, we extended our rituals to the due date of our result. It almost caused trouble because by then we must have graduated and could be carried away by the euphoria that comes with graduation. It sounds funny now but that was how desperate we were at that time.

Meanwhile, what amazes me is that we never declared a thanksgiving Novena or fast. We only bought petty gifts for thanksgiving and it ended there. I know this is applicable to all of us (including you reading) in our various lives. It can be seen also in the way we relate with one another, in the sense that we pester others when in need and can forget them for a very long time or till God-knows-when when all seems so well with us, as long as we do not encounter a problem that would mean going back to them.

That makes me wonder if most of us would have turned to prayer if not for hard times. Perhaps, tests, hardships and disappointments makes us more committed by putting us in the  actively praying mood which would not have been that strong  if we flourish effortlessly all times.

Difficult times continually remind us of our dependency on God and fill the gaps we might have created during the very good times. However, we still need to pray at all times.

Your analysis could be irrelevant.

There are times we seem to worry a lot whereas all we need to do is simply forge ahead.

Although, certain level of anxiety is normal in the sense that they guide us rightly, we may have noticed we are better off without it. Besides, we function effectively when less tensed.

Well, I have observed that there are moments that what we have actually calculated to be an outcome as humans totally take a different turn.

Perhaps, all we need to do is simply do our bit and leave the rest. The words are ” play your own part” and the remainder falls in place. Moreover, always live a happy life.

Woman I Met on a Bus

 

It was a journey of about six hours but due to the traffic, stops and bad roads, it lasted longer than required.  I was travelling to Lagos from the east, Onitsha to be precise. Without wasting much time many passengers bordered the luxurious bus and the journey began.

A friend had warned me earlier about the ill-occurrences that take place on the roads especially around this time of the year and encouraged me to fly rather than using the roads. He listed many cases of theft, rape and killings happening on the highway lately. Funny enough, a relative said a similar thing to me. I thought about the time and inconvenience regarding getting myself to the nearest airport which is in Owerri and far from my hometown. Meanwhile, I have already made arrangement with a local Driver to travel with him on that day.
So, bearing all these on my mind I decided to pray as long as I can throughout the journey. I said the rosary and kept repeating it till I lost count of how many decades I had actually said. However, I recall a woman sitting beside me kept staring at me and later joined me. Surprisingly to her,  she has completed five decades and am still reciting mine. She glanced at me once more and gently folded her rosary and put it inside her bag.
When we got to Benin, there was a brief stop; time for Lunch, stretching and restroom. Few minutes later, we got back to the bus. I was holding my rosary once more but this time I was interrupted. She asked ‘are you still praying?’  and I answered ‘yes’. She didn’t go further and I then asked her if anything was the problem that I can actually talk.
Huh! That was how I said bye bye to my marathon prayer session, not knowing I have said enough to see me through the journey. Hahaha!
She asked me where am from?
       My family,what I studied, my job…
       My relationship status…
       My plans for the future…
And I answered very well. Yes! Honest answers.
It was during this question time that I really noticed the personality sitting beside me. This woman was so lovely. Her looks, height, stature and the way she talked can be likened to that of one of my favorite aunt( Aunt Dora),and I mentioned that to her too.
I noticed that in between talks her husband calls came in and they kept making jokes about how he was missing her and how he was going to leave before time to make sure he doesn’t keep her waiting after the long journey. If my guess is right, she should be in her mid-fifties or there-about, am not that wonderful in guessing ages right by mere looks. She had been away for a week to look after her mother-in-law.

It was now her turn to do most of the talking. She told me to never underestimate prayers and went on and told me how God has been faithful to her.  I was very lucky to have such a caring man as a husband and from her persistent phone calls, their love remained evergreen. She smiled and said that she deserved it, that marriage is not as easy as it looks.

Back in her teens as a student, she mistakenly fell pregnant for a man that showered her with lots of gifts and promised her marriage. Initially, she was worried that her parents would not be happy and she would like to complete her secondary school education first. It was actually her first time of having sex and she got trapped. It made her see her whole dream of better life crumbling before her. When she broke the news to the man he wasn’t even surprise and told her where she would go for an abortion and made the necessary arrangements. She was shocked but did not allow him know how she felt.

She started praying to God, made all sorts of promises if she happens to come out alive after going under the knife and still be fertile. That day came and pass. At the clinic she got to know that her lover was a regular,  always bringing in different girls. She never contacted him again and that was how their story ended. She told no one about it, not even her mother or close friends. And has not mentioned it to her loving husband, who sees her as the best.

On completion of her studies, she went on holiday and met a man that couldn’t take his eyes off her. He has already met her Uncle and made his intentions clear, so it was not hideous this time, though she was yet to tell her parents. Her parents consented when they heard about it, traditional marriage rites were carried out and she took in for this man. Her parents were not happy as they wanted it to be after the impending white wedding as they were staunch Catholics but she was overjoyed knowing that her womb was not damaged after-all.   The religious perspective meant nothing to her, knowing her ordeal. She then left her family house and joined her husband.

Later, they had a white wedding following her delivery. Her husband trained her in the University and she now owns a Secondary School in Lagos. They are blessed with Three boys.

In regards to her loving husband, she said they have been very supportive of each other. According to her, some years back her marriage was not that lovely as it is now. There was a time her husband kept late nights and talked to her like she meant nothing to him. She was confused but never allowed that affect her work because she needed to be there for her kids no matter what. She sought advice and got different versions but only an Elderly woman encouraged her to be herself and should still care for her husband and not even raise her voice towards him. It was so difficult for her and most times she ended up challenging her husband because she is human and as it was in tune with advice from other numerous sources.

Her situation got worse and close friends were becoming aware of her condition. She got tired of complaining to any one. She ran into the same old woman who wanted to know how she was faring and she told her how her marriage has deteriorated and how she was not able to do exactly as she told her. The woman told her that she never said it was going to be very easy but that was all she needed to do to redeem her marriage. She made her understand that with such attitude and prayer her husband will come back to his senses soon while hostility will drive him further away and make him jump to conclusions.

Amidst these trial period, she loved and missed her husband. She pulled herself together and this time took this woman’s advice wholeheartedly. She welcomes him, be it midnight or 2 am, helps him remove his clothes, if he is willing to eat fine, if he isn’t, she will gently send her food back to the kitchen. She continued this way and was almost getting used to the routine, when her husbands character gradually started changing as though it was magic. He began chatting her up and coming home on time, till one day he was able to narrate to her how another woman almost destroyed their marriage.

She explained to me how her husband would prefer to borrow money from outsiders for business to make her see him as man of the house but those days are gone with the wind as no one knows how they handle their affairs any more. She made her husband understand that he trained her and her money is simply his. With God on her side, school business in Lagos is very lucrative and being the hardworking type she has been able to get sponsorship from Cowbell and the likes.

They started assisting each other financially, spiritually and all the -lly’s you can think of.  Her husband’s business booms and they both live comfortably and very happy. Above all, they turned out to be best friends and are inseparable.

She did not forget to tell me that some of their friends and even few relatives were not happy with their progress. Besides, there is no word in her dictionary like ‘close or best friend.’ Her husband is now her all-in-one. She also mentioned how vital sex is in marriage, owing to the fact that men love sex and how she continually prays for Gods grace upon her family.

Remember, we were still in the bus. She alighted at Berger and I tiredly started looking around through the window  to the lovely views of Lagos. The journey was a very long one but I enjoyed it.

Lastly, I thank God for a smooth and safe journey.

Follow @AyinotuV

Being Patient.

Amidst the struggles in life
Always be patient and keep faith.

At times, it can be very difficult trying to be patient.
There are moments we seem to be eaten-up by the silence of patience.
But what happens when you try to push and worsen the situation?

It is not always easy being on a queue.
Especially, when you do not know:
How long it will last,
The length of the queue,
And when there is no known time-frame for each participant,
Or perhaps if there could be any disruption.

Most times, we might wish we are on the fast lane,
Not knowing what the future has in stock for us.
We might wish we have the power to take others off our way
Not realising the fact that their time might not be appropriate for us.

Some people bear Patience- Ndidiamaka in my mother tongue
Is that an indication that they are truly endowed with this divine virtue?
Does the word reflect on their life experiences?
I wish I can answer that or you can tell better…

All you have to do is to exercise patience
Because God is in control and only His will comes to pass.

Breathe in faith, breathe out doubts.
Patience is a virtue.


It feels so right

I am glad I did this today.
Have been thinking of how to start,
But simply needed to get started.

It really feels so right.
Am already getting there,
Can see am really close.

*My very first blog*